Thoughts on fear, anxiety, worry, and how to conquer them daily!
Checking in, friends. How are YOU doing?! Have you checked in with yourself lately and really evaluated where you’re at mentally and physically? It’s SO important to check in from time to time and just take note of how you’re truly feeling inside and out. I hope you take the time to do that sometime soon.
Anyways, today I am tackling a subject that we all deal with at some point in our lives….FEAR.
Whether it’s heights, spiders, social situations, or flying in a plane….we all have fears. But what exactly is fear. Is it a sense that our life is being threatened, an autonomic response to perceived danger, or that there is just something that we can’t quite pin point that feels uncomfortable? I once read a book called My Age of Anxiety. It was absolutely incredible and when I finished, I left it learning a ton about myself and my own anxiety.
One thing that stuck out to me is how the author talks about fear as a driving force behind anxiety. It’s had me thinking a lot about fears role in my own life and how it can be such a hindrance to growth, prosperity, success, and change within our lives.
To me, fear is manifested from our desire to be in control at all times. Being out of control, fearing the unknown, and feeling a threat to our self-esteem, are all common roots of the fear we feel everyday. But at some point we have to stop dwelling on things that we simply cannot control. It’s easier said than done, of course, but if we keep this in mind we can slowly start incorporating it into our everyday lives.
Point blank, fear is crippling. It’s the antithesis of truly living and keeps us from reaching our full potential by stifling our ability to break boundaries and move outside of our comfort zone. Stop living in the ‘what if’ and start living in the ‘here and now’.
In fact think of fear as a blinking arrow pointing you towards the things you should be working to overcome, conquer, and reframe your thinking around. It’s like compass pointing you towards the areas in your life that have room for growth. For example if you fear flying, that means you should expose yourself as much as possible to that trigger in hopes of overcoming it. You’ll not only feel a sense of accomplishment, but also you’ll be motivated to tackle other, more detrimental fears in your life. After all, fear is nothing more than an obstacle that stands in the way of progress.
Fear is focusing on what will happen next instead of embracing what happening NOW. While it’s good to be proactive and anticipate possible scenarios, we should work on being more present and mindful to avoid the overwhelming, innumerable possibilities of the next moment.
I know I’ve talked a lot about reducing fear’s power in your life but I don’t want that to generate a new fear for you. Fearing fear itself and being critical of yourself for feeling fear is just as bad! So be patient and compassionate with yourself. Know that a certain level of fear is healthy and HUMAN! It can keep us safe and trigger internal responses for self-preservation. But when fears become overwhelming and transition into all-encompassing anxiety where your mind is obsessed and overrun with worry, that’s when fear is dangerous.
So just be mindful and take inventory of the fears in your life. Are you actively working to challenge them on a daily basis? Are they rational? Are they keeping you from living life to the fullest? Ask yourself these questions. Don’t let them consume you and keep you from pursuing your life goals and aspirations.
Just some thoughts I felt needed to be shared! I think we can all use some reminders to challenge our comfort zones and our thoughts sometimes.
What’s one of your everyday fears?
Do you feel fear has held you back in someway in your life?
What are your strategies for combatting fear?
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Debbie Rodrigues says
Fear is slow lying me down a bit right now, Kaila. I know that sooner or later I will have to take a leap of faith, but I am still postponing it. Thank you so much for the inspiring post. I will surely be reading it more times throughout the day. Have a great week!
Healthy Helper says
So happy this post could help you in some way! I am sorry to hear you’re in a tough place! Hoping things turn around for you soon. 🙂
AmyC says
Fear of what others think keeps me from doing/saying things sometimes…I worry too much about whether it’s the right thing or the effect on others.
Healthy Helper says
I definitely struggle with that too!
Heather Williams says
Great post girl! I discovered fear was at the root of my chronic anxiety about six years ago. I’ve been fearful as a child and have no idea why. Knowing this and being aware of it has ultimately led me to being able to be stronger than I ever imagined it.
I think when you can recognize fear, greet it in the face, and confront it instead of run from it, you’re ultimately more able to conquer it successfully. Now I know when I feel it coming up that it’s not something I need to be afraid of, and instead, just something I need to pay attention to and train my brain to accept the fear and then walk the other way with courage. It’s so hard but with practice it gets much easier-I promise!
I am thinking about you and so glad you’re enjoying the book. Happy Memorial day hun!!:)
Healthy Helper says
Thank you Heather!I think being able to acknowledge and identify your fears definitely makes you a stronger person. That way you’re able to expose yourself to them and conquer them! 🙂
Heather Williams says
You’re welcome!:) I totally agree with you!
Michelle Hunt (@PeachyPalate) says
It’s definitely held me back in the past! I used to worry about everything and anything…if I wasn’t worrying about something going wrong I’d being worrying why I wasn’t!!! I fear the big things like my family members getting ill but I don’t let them bog me down. Worry and fear go hand in hand for me and if at any time I find they overwhelm my mind I remember an image I saw once of someone sitting a rocking chair…fear and worry, like rocking back and forth, going no where, achieving nothing but wasting time! Great post!
Healthy Helper says
Thank you Michelle! It’s good to hear you’ve been able to get over some of your fears and that it no longer holds you back like it did in the past! I think we all have the capacity to move past our fears and take our lives back from our worries.
Erica @ Erica Finds says
Not to be a downer, but Garmin/treadmill times do not equal an official Par. Needs to be a measured course. Nice finish though!
Healthy Helper says
Yeah I was wondering the same thing. Whether you actually count a PR if it’s not a race! Thanks for the clarification!
Eryn says
Hi! Loved your post on fears. I totally can relate and thought it was so well done. ‘The Age of Anxiety’ is on my wishlist to read so I’m really excited to see that you’re enjoying it! I’ve struggled with chronic anxiety since high school, so it definitely hits home!
Way to go on your PR! I’m just starting to run and am loving every second.
Have an awesome day!
Eryn
Healthy Helper says
Thank you Eryn! Let me know how you like the book if you end up reading it!!
Ashley @ AlmostVegGirlie says
Fear definitely has a way of holding us back if we aren’t mindful about it! For me, my fear of making the wrong choices keeps me from branching out and trying new things sometimes. It makes me question if I’ve made the right decision, but constantly thinking about the what-ifs is exhausting and NOT useful!
Kristen says
Ugh this is me! I am always afraid of something – mostly what people are thinking of me and how I’m doing at work/with new friends. I like trying new things but also fear it as well. I recently had to get over this because I decided to move to Alaska! I was afraid of everything – how expensive/difficult the drive up there would be, what my job would be like, how much I’d miss my family, etc. But I was able to get over all that and just be excited instead! I’m trying not to let fear control me but I’m sure I’ll always have it.
Brittany says
What an amazing post! Sounds like a great book. I would count it as a PR you worked hard.
Lauren says
So wonderful! I’ve realized the past few years is fear is such a marker for growth. Instead of running from it, I can “feel the fear, and do it anyway.” Our fears are there for a reason, and when we challenge ourselves, we grow stronger from it.
Brianna K. @ Hungy Gator Gal says
Fear of the unknown used to kill me. Questions like, “Will I get an internship?,” Will I get in to law school?,” or “Should I work for a year instead?” used to keep me up at night. At one point I just started taking one day at a time. Now the “not knowing” is actually the fun part. I’m still organized and plan things, but I don’t try to plan everything. You can’t map out every scenario. Besides, a life fully planned would be boring! 🙂
Julianna @ Julianna Bananna says
congrats on that PR! i’d definitely count it if i were you! 😉
definitely agree that fear is crippling – and focused on the future, which we don’t have control over today. i’ve been working on being more present lately!
Allie says
Wonderful post! I have the BIGGEST fear of flying. I always try my best to just fly (when I get the chance haha) and last time wasn’t too bad, but the time before that I had a cry-fest in the airport before boarding. Yikes, haha. I love the point you made about fear being like an arrow to point you towards what you should work to overcome. I’m going to start to think of it that way instead of something to run from! Thanks for sharing what you’re learning 🙂
Heather Burnett says
love this important reminder!!!
Healthy Helper says
Thanks Heather!!
Holly Doherty says
Thanks for your thoughts. I found you via the Live Randomly Simple link party. I just finished reading Fear the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers. She says that the root of all fear is not the thing itself, but the belief that you can’t handle it. It changed the way I look at fear. By reminding myself that I can handle any situation, even if “the worst” happens, it lessens my fear and enables me to act. I look forward to reading My Age of Anxiety soon.
Healthy Helper says
That sounds like an amazing book that you read! I need to check it out!
Holly says
It’s actually FEEL the Fear, not Fear the Fear. I mistyped. 🙂
Healthy Helper says
Gotcha! I’ll look it up!!
Rhonda says
Great tips. We all face fear at some point in our life. Thanks for sharing on Sunday’s Best.
Healthy Helper says
Thanks Rhonda! I am glad you stopped by to read this!!
shelley says
My biggest fear is snakes. So what did I do? I married a man who has absolutely no fear whatsoever and who is actually intrigued and fascinated by them. He’s helped me slowly get to the point where I don’t totally freak out if I see one, but I still don’t like them.
Healthy Helper says
That’s a GREAT way to face a fear!!